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Pull That Thread Everything is Connected If You Stretch It Long Enough

ESPN to Some Guy from Forbes: ‘Be Like, Mike’.

Posted on December 27, 2009

Who the Hell is Mike Miller from Forbes Magazine?

You know why this ESPN story on the Financial Impact of the Tiger Woods Scandal is so credible? Because once in a while the words 'Forbes Magazine' flashes up on the screen. And when you see the name 'Forbes Magazine' you think 'financial stuff.' And then you conclude: 'Wow! This story on the financial impact of the Tiger Woods scandal is obviously a work of real journalistic integrity!'

Here's a sampling of what Forbes Magazine had to say:

"The majority of (Tiger's) income comes from selling products for other companies"
"The PGA is going to take it really on the chin."
"Nike is going to have to come up with some new and innovate ways to advertise while Tiger takes this time off."

Of course, when your Uncle Joe says stuff like this, you say: "Thank you, Captain Obvious!" But when Forbes Magazine says it, it really makes you stop and think.

I guess propping the magazine itself up on a stool was too hard, because they got some guy named Mike Miller to fill in for it.

Who he is isn't important. I know this because "Mike Miller" himself is unidentified. So there was obviously nothing about him ESPN thought could enhance the story's credibility. He could be a PR Flack from Forbes Magazine. He could be a restroom attendant from Forbes Magazine. He could be an axe murderer from Forbes Magazine.

He doesn't even have to be Mike Miller. He just has to be from Forbes Magazine.

Which is good, because there is no Mike Miller who works at Forbes Magazine that looks like this guy.

Matthew Miller reports on 2009 story: Who is Allen Stanford?

Given the severe competitive pressures involved with getting as much content online as fast as possible to feed the public's need for in-depth, objective, and accurate reporting on the Tiger Woods scandal, I understand why ESPN would not want to spend those precious few seconds checking the facts on the unimportant stuff like the names of the experts it includes in its stories for added credibility.

But you don't want to give anal-retentive crackpots even the slimmest opportunity to question your high journalistic standards. Next time, just put: SOME GUY. It not only covers any eventuality, it's always accurate. A real bonus when you're in the business of reporting the facts.

"Honest honey, that's not me. That's my Doppelganger, MIKE Miller. And I got the ESPN Video to PROVE it!"

Here's a picture of Matthew Miller in October 2008 at the 2nd Annual Forbes Billionaire Charity Poker Tournament aboard the Forbes yacht, The Highlander, as photographed by the New York Social Diary.

(The chick's name is Elizabeth Betsylow.
Or, just to be safe, SOME CHICK).

"Matthew Miller, Forbes. An associate editor, Mr. Miller is responsible for overseeing a staff of 30 writers and reporters for the annual Forbes 400 Richest Americans list. Additionally, he writes about the business of vice for the magazine." (2007 information)

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